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Sisters’ Retreat: Transformation!

Dear Sisters*,

I invite you to take part in a deep, nourishing, creative process this March!

TRANSFORMATION: Death and Rebirth March 4 – 7, 2019

Monday evening to Thursday afternoon at  Boulder Mountain Guest Ranch in Boulder, Utah. 

Pilgrimage North, Winter Season, Water Element

Opening Celebration: Sowing the Seed, a wake for lives we leave behind. Each woman writes her own Eulogy before the celebration. Friends and family are invited for the opening celebration Monday evening.

This is one of a 5-part series, where each retreat has a corresponding season, element, direction, emotion, voice, time of life…  There are many varying systems for aligning these qualities; I am working with the way that I have studied (a form of Chinese medicine) as an organizing principle, because I am most familiar with it and it works.

The “pilgrimage” is in both inner and outer landscapes.  The outer movement over the land in a certain direction is both metaphorically and physically evocative.  We move with an intention to practice relationship with self and other, with the land and nature, with the Divine/Creator in all, including ourselves.

The vision is for an immersion experience: for the group to sleep and dream together/nearby as much as possible.  Lodging will be at the Boulder Mountain Guest Ranch.

Contact Amber to register or for more information.Community offering price: $75 to $200 sliding scale includes lodging when you register by February 28. Food will be partial potluck, partial pack your own.

Register now with $50 to claim your space!





Amber X. Van Cleave

541 232-4379

*Woman-identified, transgender, and/or gender fluid individuals who are interested in sharing this experience please contact me to discuss whether this would feel like a safe space for you.

Top photo: a spread from Rainbow Warrior Awaken! deck by Mara Berendt Friedman (Artist) and Trinity Harris (Author)

Present Amber: It’s a Wonderful Life!

I moved to Utah three years ago with a hopeful vision of partnership.  Such a profound intention shared by two people can bring deep healing of old patterns if we are willing to walk the path.  Eric and I are living separately for this, our fourth year, allowing spaciousness to further our individual healing processes.  In the bedrock of my heart this feels right, but at times it is hard, confusing, frustrating, and just plain uncertain. I have found myself doubting the choices I have made along my path and wondering if indeed I do have something of value to offer to my community, my village.  

Friday after Thanksgiving, while visiting Eric in Boulder Town, we had a movie day.  In It’s a Wonderful Life, George Bailey keeps missing out on his dreams of travel and adventure, but gets supernatural help to realize how important and blessed his ordinary life really is.  Then in The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy has a similarly out-of-this-world experience to show her how much her home and family mean to her.  We both cried a lot that day… And I am heartened by these modern myths of the hero’s journey.  

When we bring groups of students together to lie down at the feet of the trees, our heart-sharing seems to always have a theme.   There was just one time when Eric said he didn’t think we had a theme, but later I was gifted this song incorporating pieces from our sharing that day, which I call Messages from Bristlecone Pine

Close your eyes.
What’s your hurry?
Sit yourself down here in the shade. 
Take off your shoes.
Come a little bit closer.
Sit very still, lift up your face. 
If you climb up in my branches, you will be held like a child. 
We’re not so very different, you and I. 

There was a footpath 
Long before the road, 
So many people have come and gone. 
High on this cliff face 
My roots grow strong, 
You have roots too, can you feel where you belong? 
If you climb out to the edges, 
You will know an awesome view. 
Your fear can never get the best of you. 

There’s more to life 
Than meets your eyes, 
But you have other eyes in your soul. 
With each irritation, 
Each bump in the road, 
We grow more lovely, you and I, as we grow old. 
If you look inside my body, you’ll see ring on ring on ring. 
We need never ever forget we are part of everything.  

Open to your life. Open to your life. Open to your life. 
We are alive.  

Thank you. 

Disclaimer! None of the statements would be or are approved by the FDA. Not meant to diagnose or treat anything! Educate yourself by studying ethno-botany, seek out herbalists, plant a garden, learn about wild plants. Do not use internally. Keep away from heat and direct light. Keep safe from young ones. Use with Wisdom & Intention.

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